Tag Archives: los angeles

Sweet E’s New Cupcakes Might Get You Drunk (Or I Can Hope)


I’m not usually a very sweet blogger (let’s face it, I’m a bit of a crazy fiery-hearted bitch), but I do have a weakness for sweet stuff… of any kind.

My apartment is a very, very short walk to the famed micro-bakery Sweet E’s. I attribute my love handles to my love of their mini sinckerdoodle cupcakes, cookies and cream cakepops and peanut butter bliss bars. But this month, both the Irish sweet-a-holic and alcoholic in me will have something to buzz over.

May I present the Bailey’s Irish Cupcake:

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Eddie Izzard Experiments with New Material from “Stripped,” Talks About Spiritual Atheism (or Jokes I Think He Should Keep)


Eddie Izzard, this is God! (in squeaky Mike Tyson voice)

I mean, this is God! (adjust to deep, throbbing James Earl Jones voice) Eddie, I just want you to know that I love “praying dinosaur” and I think you should nurture and develop him and watch him grow into a cold-blooded televangelist preacher. I would totally send him money at 2am, even though I’m God and don’t need to because I would really just be sending money to myself. Okay, this is kind of an awkward voice message. How do I delete it? (sound of banging) Damn iPhone! I’ll kill Steve Jobs. Wait, I already did that. Oh, fuck it. I’ll let this girl get on with her bloody blog post…

Thanks, God. You are going to make me go over my word count. Sheesh.

So,  I attended one of Izzard’s midnight shows at the Largo this week. This wasn’t my first time seeing him. Back in 2000, I (accompanied by a motley crew of subversively funny nerd girls) embarked on an epic 20-hour Amtrak train ride from Tampa to Philadelphia just to see him perform at the Painted Bride. (Don’t worry, we were drunk the entire time). Last night, I was only in the car for about 10 minutes. (Sigh, I was sober.)

Since, Izzard was basically bouncing jokes off the audience I wanted to do a rundown of his most humorous highlights. So, without ado, I present my favorite gems from the 90-minute rib-cracking stream-of-consciousness mind adventure he took us on: Continue reading

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Red Alert: Eddie Izzard Stays Up Late at the Largo Every Night Until 2.21


If you are an Angelino and you love Eddie Izzard, then get thee to the Largo tonight… or any night (except for Wednesday) this week.  Izzard is showcasing all-new material from Stripped… and it’s only $30. Um, why are you still reading this post, when you could be purchasing tickets here?

I got my tickets and I’ll give you the down-low on his new material in the next couple of days…

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Photos: Strange Days in the City


I’ve been spending more and more time away from Mars and more time in this dusty city by the sea they call Los Angeles. Both places have a lot in common. They are both hollowed-out, dry dust bowls that glow pink and red when the sun hangs just so in the sky. They are both full of aliens. Some say they are both far-out.

I woke up last Saturday to a bleached out day, took my camera to the Santa Monica Pier and snapped off into that familiar sun. Larger from here than it is from home and much brighter, much warmer. I had to take some photos for my scrap book. Things here are so strange…

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My Mina Dress Brings all the Boyz to the Yard (That’s right, it’s better than yours)


Last year, I pleaded with the universe to deliver me Mina’s red absinthe dress from Bram Stroker’s Dracula, so I could wear it to the Los Angeles’ Labyrinth of Jareth Ball.

Well, the universe is indifferent; I learned to sew . . . well, kinda.

What resulted was a hybrid between Mina’s red Absinthe gown and Satine’s red number in Moulin Rouge!.

I’m not going to claim that it is the most well-constructed costume of it’s kind on the internet. The dress only consists of a few key elements: an 18-inch red tight-lacing corset from Orchard Corsets, one red night gown (previously gifted), a small pillow, red fabric, red rose lining, needle, thread, and the imagination (and construction skills) of the bossy five year-old girl in all of us.

Deadstarlet in the Mina Dress, posed by the Bordello in Venice Beach. Photo by J. Burgdorf

Click here to see full photo gallery. Continue reading

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DeadBeats: Cyranoid (ft. DeadStarlet) “The Dust that Never Settles”


Last month, I found myself in the mossy green arms of the N.E. seaboard, on yet another adventure into 21st Century Bohemia, where I got the chance to jam with experimental darkwave group Cyranoid, headquartered in the heart of darkness of Brooklyn.

The improv musical session resulted in this song.

\”The Dust That Never Settles\” by Cyranoid (ft. Deadstarlet)

Yes, that’s me on vocals. Yes, I know, I sound like a tart.

Just to make it clear, I’m technically not singing on this track. I’m more or less using my “boots of shiny, shiny leather” voice, which disturbingly sounds like a teenage strumpet with the extracurricular activities of Laura Palmer. No, you cannot read my diary. (Or are you reading it now?)

Cyranoid is comprised of Pharwolf and Mr. Nothing. I’ve known these assholes for what seems like an eternity. You may have not heard of these motherfuckers here on Earth, but they are huge on Mars. HUGE. Continue reading

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Poems: I Dumped Edgar Allan Poe


I Dumped Edgar Allan Poe
with a swift kick from my left boot,
his asymmetrical face, like the front lobe
of his brain, plummeted into a puddle
by the old Boar’s Snout. A smashed
pumpkin, with brains inside.
His carved mouth, ajar, gurgling
through green liquid grime.
A bubble with every love letter still bursting
for that bitch: Annabel Lee. Well,
I am not Annabel Lee. The drunk
just couldn’t think of something
to rhyme

with sea. An ocean rippled
by his snorts and moans. A mouthful
of stagnant rain, rolling
to the edges of the puddle,
swallowing brick, splashing
the ruffles of my skirt. He reaches
out his ink-stained hand
the way he stirred anise into
the absinthe

with a long silver spoon, the night
he wept and told me: I was Annabel Lee.
Well, I am not Annabel Lee. I’m not
wrapped in twine. A pale blue
angel by the sea.

With a boot to his throat, he tries
to scream. Scream for all of his
Annabel Lees. A dozen pale-skinned
widows, lined against the shore of
his sea. All wondering if they were the
real Annabel Lee. Their tongues licking
him up and rolling him back. The
ocean’s rough throat, where a word
breaks through the surface.
A bubble

with the last bit of air expelled
for someone, not Annabel Lee.

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Someone Buy Me Mina’s Absinthe Dress (or Take Me Away From All this Debt)


LestatCouture on Etsy is selling Mina’s Absinthe Dress for 3,000 clams.The red Victorian bustle dress  is a pretty damn good reproduction of the gown designed by Eiko and worn by Winona Ryder in Coppola’s gothic masterpiece Bram Stoker’s Dracula.

Someone buy it for me. I would look really cute.

Okay, okay. So, you probably think this post is all style and no substance, but Continue reading

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K-Town Tapas: Food from the Future, Now


K-town’s underground tapas scene is like visiting the future – if, in the future, everyone speaks Korean and hangs out in hazy dive bars known for spicy late night kimchi and ass-flooring dragon juice.

Straight out from some steampunk chapter of Bladerunner’s Los Angeles, DGM (Korean for “Back Alley”) is the kind of dig where you can share a pitcher of beer, smoke a cigarette (yes, you can smoke there) and wait for your memory-dealer to show up with a mechanized stripper with a fake snake. Or not.

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