Tagged with david bowie

Aliens We’d Like to F#ck (and iO9′s Guide to Seducing an Extraterrestrial)


Do you prefer your lovers to be out-of-this world? So do we. After all, we come from Mars. And iO9 comes from the future. Well, in this case… cums.

iO9 (one of the best subversive science blogs in the solar system) just published their Valentine’s Day guide to bedding that special someone from the other side of the galaxy. There are so many factors for intergalactic pick-up artists (I.P.U.A.s) to consider. Out here, in the best little whore house in the galaxy, we’ve seen everything: strange mating customs, unpleasant odors, emotional issues, awkward genital placement, dangerous anatomy, frighting fetishes, and extraterrestrial S.T.D.s. iO9 covers most of them.

But what we want to know is this: who would you screw? We have our top picks. If you’re not all hot and bothered over them, post your cosmic crushes in the comment section below. We want to know your fantasy: Continue reading

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These Songs Are Red Hot (or How We Celebrate Valentine’s Day on Mars)


I’m sure by all the hearts you see splayed-out on this site, you’re getting the feelin’ it might be Valentine’s Day on Mars (it’s a bigger deal on Venus.) In honor of this Hallmark holiday, I could write something all mushy (like a red velvet bleeding heart cake). Something made to make the heart flutter. But let’s face it, Valentine’s Day is much more interesting when we make something “else” flutter, right?

After all, this is a brothel.

And that brings me to this Wednesday’s musical post. I’ve been taking pole dancing lessons and I have a recital coming up. (Yes, a pole dancing recital. No, you are not invited.) So, I made a list of all the songs that I wish our group was ‘rump shakin’ too… and, hopefully, these tracks will get your honey’s actual heart-rate up, amongst other things… Continue reading

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